On our last evening in Thailand, we decided to finally go for a Thai massage – it wouldn’t be right to leave without having gotten one!

JJ went for the full traditional Thai massage, and I went for a foot and leg massage, as anything else would have killed me. When I asked him about the experience, he said the masseuse (who to me sounds like a bit of a sadist) basically had him in wrestling positions, and that I would have ended up with every joint of my body dislocated. Somehow I don’t think my insurance would cover a full body dislocation, broken neck & spine, and my skin basically torn from my body. But yeah, he really enjoyed it (which perhaps makes him a bit of a masochist?), rating it a solid 8/10!

I’ve always liked the idea of a foot massage, but I’ve always been too self-conscious. Since I stopped wearing the splints which helped me to walk from the age of about 2 to when I was 13, my feet have become more & more deformed over time, so I’ve only ever let people I’m close to see them. But I didn’t feel worried about it at all. I don’t know if it’s because I’m generally just getting more comfortable in my own skin, or because I knew I wouldn’t see the masseuse again, but I didn’t once hesitate at the idea of having it done. As soon as she saw my feet, she said “ahh problem? Soft?”. That helped. She’d acknowledged that my feet were clearly a bit fucked up, and I felt reassured that she wouldn’t hurt me.

It was a really relaxing experience, where I sat back and listened to what I suppose could be described as whale music, as she made my feet – parts of me that have only ever really felt pain – feel something nice for once. Pleasant sensations aren’t something I’ve ever been able to associate with my usually pained feet, my weak (now mosquito bite-ridden) legs, my wrinkled scars. So it was a welcome change.

Parts of it did still hurt, even with her being gentle. My EDS makes my skin super sensitive to the slightest pain (I still can’t believe I’ve managed so many tattoos). So the parts where she rubbed my legs with the towel and sort of pinched at my skin wasn’t nice, but she went more easy on me when I winced a bit too loudly. The karate-style chopping she carried out on my feeble limbs didn’t hurt, surprisingly. Who knew martial art inspired massage techniques could be so gentle?

Overall it was an enjoyable experience, and I didn’t want it to end. When it did, I was left feeling super relaxed, with a smile on my face. A happy ending, if you will… no, not like that!

Photo by Mirza Babic on Unsplash